yesterday i spent the entire day with my boyfriends family. we had a little celebration of life for his grandpa and there were SO many people there. i kind of just sat in the corner all day and people watched. the one thing i absolutely love about ian’s family is how positive they are about EVERYTHING. my family is most definitely on the negative side of life. in all good situations they mark the bad. and i’ve kind of taken that way into life also. in all good situations, i ALWAYS mark the bad. but i’m trying really hard to change that about myself because i hate it. when we were out of power for about a week, i heard someone say to my grandma, “well at least you have a generator and a wood stove. heat is the most important thing” and my grandma’s response to that was “yeah”. yeah? yeah? really? we have SO much more than most people have. no, we didn’t have water, but we came up with ways to get water. at least we have a generator so it seemed like we didn’t even lose power, and having a wood stove is really a life savor. ian’s mom was out of power for 8 days, and i think it was warmer outside than it was inside. i wish that people would just realize how lucky they really are and stop taking that stuff for granted. being with ian’s family makes me so cozy and comfortable. when you meet them they are so nice and friendly. this is the second celebration of life i’ve been to with them, once for his cousin, and now for his grandpa, but they treat me like i’m part of the family. and since my family never has any cool little get togethers, it’s nice to be apart of that. i hope one day when we’re old and retired, that we’re exactly like his grandparents. they are the strongest people i know. they have the greatest hearts i’ve ever seen in anyone, and they’re love for each other, is just the most inspiring. i love ian and i can’t wait to get married and to have our own place - well actually, i can. but i’m really excited for the what the future is going to bring us.
1. Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
2. Would you date an 18-year-old at the age you are now?
3. When’s the last time you were aggravated and happy at the same time?
4. Would you ever smile at a stranger?
5. Is there someone mad…
If it’s something I’ve learned not having a job, it would be happiness. I’ve truly never been as happy as I have been this past month. I’ve also never been more broke. Growing up, I wasn’t necessarily rich, but my grandpa did own his own construction company at the time, so we were pretty well off. Plus I was the only one my grandparents were taking care of, so I guess you could say that I was spoiled. But when our financial situation turned around pretty hard, my grandma always told me that I should find a rich man to marry, so that I knew I’d be safe financially. She kind of raised me on believing that money IS the key to happiness, and it’s been really hard to break me from that. But with not having a job, means having no money. Just enough to be able to survive off anyways. But I think I’ve finally overcome it.
Me and Ian used to fight, a lot. We don’t anymore. In fact, we broke up last night, but other than that, in the past month, that’s the first time we’ve fought. Which is a huge accomplishment for us. We had a chat the other night, and we both just kind of broke down. But it was the best conversation I’ve ever had. I’ve never felt more comfortable than I did, holding his hand, and looking into his eyes, than I did that night. I love him so much. For the first time in a long time, I feel like things are going to be okay, and things will work out.
Of course, with quitting my job, that takes my friends list from, well.. like 5 friends to like.. 3 friends. hahaha but I’m totally okay with it. It’s what I asked for, so that’s what I got. But I do love my friendships. All of them have their own lives, but we always have time for each other when we need them. I love our tiny, harmless little get togethers. It makes me okay with not having friends. Hahaha,
We finally finished watching the entire series of Charmed. I think I wanna watch it again. I miss feeling like the TV show is apart of my life. But now I’m making Ian watch The OC with me, because it’s my all time favorite show. Then One Tree Hill, and Degrassi here and there because those, I don’t own the season’s of.
My new years resolutions are to be more honest. To not bottle up all my emotions and to talk to people when I have a problem with them, instead of bottling them up and then exploding eventually. Also to appreciate life more. I’ve lost/given up on so much my entire life, instead of just appreciating what I have. And to start losing weight. Me and Ian agreed that when I lose 50 pounds he’ll quit smoking. That gives me about 6 months to lose weight and 6 months for him to quit :) hahaha although, I won’t hold my breathe. I’ve been feeling pretty lazy lately. Sims all day, errryday.
i meant to answer this sooner, but only a couple of them. if you remember my photobucket i’ll upload them there, like the good ol’ days. hahaha if not, shoot me a text.
